i maed dis

A touch of spring in the middle of winter

“We’d been apart so long–I’d been dead so long,” she said in English. “I thought surely you’d built a new life, with no room in it for me. I’d hoped that.”
“My life is nothing but room for you.” I said. “It could never be filled by anyone but you.”

‘Mother Night’, Kurt Vonnegut

*

“I’m back in the grey wet bleakness known as home. The contrast with Barcelona is remarkable – only a few days ago I was walking in a zoo in just my jeans and a T-shirt, whereas returning here meant below zero temperatures and snow blizzards (and a rather morose mood after learning the fact that my luggage decided to spend way longer in Amsterdam than I did… got it the next day though). However, all that pretty white snow has melted into a yucky mushy brown substance and the sidewalks are covered in melting ice for that extra slippery touch. The flu season is also in full swing, so I hope that the vaccine I got in the autumn will help protect me, I could really do without all those pains and fevers, thankyouverymuch.”

deice

Yay, the plane is having a sauna!

The above is a paragraph that has been sitting in the drafts folder for two months now. I can proudly say that I did not get the flu, so I guess the flu shot worked. It’s looking a bit more like spring at home as well by now but just barely.

Anyway, Barcelona was fun and a lot less awkward than I thought it would be. I guess it might have been different but due to missing my initial connecting flight (my first plane needed thorough de-icing  which took a lot longer than expected) I was so tired and bent out of shape when I finally got there that I simply had no more fucks to give.

Long story short – me and the Handsome Gentleman are an item once again and it seems that the separation after the last time has had a positive effect. We’ve both had time to think about what we did wrong and communication between us seems to be a lot better than it was before. I hope the trend continues in the same way because it occasionally still hits me how we come from completely different worlds. Seeing as we grew up on the opposite ends of Europe, it’s no wonder.

view

The weather really was wonderful

I think we had the perfect mix of being lazy and cuddling on the (terribly uncomfortable!) bed at the AirBNB and doing touristy stuff such as visiting museums and eating in fancy restaurants. But we also had KFC if we felt like it and lots of Netflix and chill, so that there wasn’t too much of oh-gods-we-need-to-get-going-if-we-want-to-do-this-and-that. I also had snails for the first time ever, that was definitely an adventure 😀

However, due to Circumstances I have no idea when we can meet again. Possibly end of June when I have another vacation coming up (the next one is about to begin on Saturday but I’ll spend it on Japan, yay) and hopefully I’ll have enough money left from all the renovations that I can afford plane tickets to the Handsome Gentleman’s current country. We both agree that a long-distance relationship can only last when it becomes a no-distance relationship at some point but currently neither of us knows when that can happen and it makes me kind of sad… but c’est la vie, right?

coffee

Last morning coffee in Spain

 

Categories: borrowed feathers, i maed dis, internal inspection, yay | Leave a comment

2015

I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.

“The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul”, Douglas Adams

*

j6gi

One of my favourite snapshots from 2015

So, it’s been a year since I last published a blog post. I haven’t felt much like putting stuff down, so I’ll just try to make one very compact post about what this year has been like, although in all likelihood this blog has no readers left 😀

I met several awesome new people this year, some more intimately than others. Quite a few of them have left the country by now but I’m getting used to that. I’ve become very picky when it comes to getting to know someone new and it’s not necessarily a bad thing. Quality over quantity – amirite or amirite?

Some blasts from the past happened as well. There is someone I am trying really hard to steer clear of and hope like hell I will manage that next year as well. There is someone who has been trying hard to get another chance of being a part of my life – we’ll see how that goes, I’m being rather careful there. There is someone who I haven’t talked to in many years (mainly due to the first person mentioned in this paragraph) but we have now officially made peace with each other, so that is nice.

I lost a close friend this year, for good. In a way he is not completely gone, as he will always be a part of me but it’s still hard. Sometimes I catch myself thinking about something and that he’d love it… and then it hits me that he is not with us any more. I am grateful for having known him and I cherish the memories of laughing so hard together that we cried 🙂

owlie

I made this oil painting during one of those awesome times 🙂 It was the first time I ever used oil paints, so I’d say I did pretty well.

2015 also marks the year when I finally went to see a psychiatrist and got antidepressants. I must say that they are working – I’m feeling a lot better, even though it means I need to keep away from booze. Drinking apple juice or cola at a bar just isn’t quite the same but I still do that occasionally. The main effect of the meds is that in situations where I’d have lost my shit earlier, I now just sigh and try to explain my point of view in a calm but firm manner. It’s like I’ve finally found a point of balance within me that has been lost for many many years.

Due to various reasons I have gained far more weight this year than I am comfortable with. I guess one of the tasks for next year is trying to tackle it but I’m not sure if I’ll go back to calorie counting. We shall see. At least my dance skills have improved – not as much as I would like but I’m definitely better than I was last year.

Work has been OK although I hope I will be able to change my position (but stay in the same department) next year. I feel like my best assets are not used in my current job and I would be more useful doing something else.

twins

Twinsies!

Oh, and I bought a brand new car in July! 🙂 It’s not very big but it’s red and cute and I am very fond of it. Come to think of it, 2015 was a year for new vehicles, as I also bought a new bicycle.

herroyalhighness

Her Royal Highness

Speaking of vacations – I went to Ireland and Italy this year – loved the first trip and hated the latter because 7000 km trapped in a bus with a chipper tour guide who never shuts up is not exactly my cup of tea. It was the absolute worst vacation I have ever had! I still haven’t uploaded the photos of either trip but I should probably deal with that very soon because in January I’ll spend a week in Barcelona and in April I’m going to Tokyo and I know I’d be really sad if something happened to my hard drive and I lost all pics from Ireland AGAIN.

I’m not making any promises about getting back to blogging in 2016 but I’m secretly hoping that I might…

Categories: borrowed feathers, i maed dis, internal inspection, toiling, yay | Leave a comment

#30daychallenge day 30

My choice of topic

wpid-img_20141031_211904.jpg

Since I’m so incredibly vain – the last photo in this challenge is a Halloween selfie 😉

 

Categories: i maed dis, memes are good for you | Leave a comment

#30daychallenge day 29

My emotion today

wpid-dsc_0409.jpg

In haste.

Categories: i maed dis, memes are good for you | Leave a comment

#30daychallenge day 28

Paper

wpid-dsc_0408.jpg

This piece of paper was attached to my new swimsuit. Thank you, Captain Obvious! 😀

Categories: i maed dis, memes are good for you | Leave a comment

#30daychallenge day 27

Fresh

wpid-dsc_0396.jpg

Freshness on my window sill in October 🙂

Categories: i maed dis, memes are good for you | Leave a comment

#30daychallenge day 26

Sexy

wpid-img_20141027_220954.jpg

Categories: i maed dis, memes are good for you | Leave a comment

#30daychallenge day 25

In motion

wpid-dsc_0385.jpg

Beautiful glow worms 🙂

Categories: i maed dis, memes are good for you | Leave a comment

#30daychallenge day 24

So cold!

wpid-img_20141025_230217.jpg

Straight from the freezer!

Categories: i maed dis, memes are good for you | Leave a comment

#30daychallenge day 23

Black and white landscape

wpid-img_20141024_142208.jpg

Well, I know this is more of a cityscape but that’s the closest thing I could come up with during my lunch break 🙂

Categories: i maed dis, memes are good for you | Leave a comment

Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com.